Crash Unreal.

faked by Sunday, September 23rd, 2007

I don’t want to talk about it.


I don’t want to talk about how Georgia threw a long ball—their first of the night—to score a touchdown in overtime.

I don’t want to talk about sitting in traffic on McFarland for an hour before even starting the three hour drive home to Jax.

I don’t want to talk about how every male member of my family, including myself, were almost arrested and/or thrown out of Bryant-Denny for either a) Sassing Tuscaloosa Police; b) The Possession of An Artificial Noisemaking Device (i.e., “Air-Horn”); c) Improper Captain Jack Sparrow Impersonations; and d) Eye-Gouging of UGA Khaki-Klad Morons, or a combination thereof.

I don’t want to talk about how neither Terry “Rocket” Grant or Glen “Hot” Coffee ran for three hundred yards, no matter how much I prayed and hollered and, at least theoretically, teared up.

I don’t want to talk about how Big Gray sent me a text that read “Sabanation!” after the loss.

I don’t want to talk about how I think we can still go for ten wins this year, because I’m suddenly terrified of a jinx.

I don’t want to talk about how much I want Ole Miss, Tennessee, Vanderbilt, Florida, Troy, Kentucky, and Tech to beat Georgia.

(But not Auburn. I hope Auburn loses every other game they ever play, for the rest of all recorded time, Yea, Until The End Times. Even their equestrian teams.)

I just don’t want to talk about it.

6 Responses to “Crash Unreal.”

  1. It was indeed a heartbreaker.

  2. bulb says:

    Sorry, but I think you’re due some more heatbreak in the Gator Bowl. The Noles owe Bama for the reffing they saw the one time they played in the 70s in Tuscaloosa.

  3. Pinky says:

    I listened to the game on the radio. I sent text messages during the game. I felt like crap when it was, suddenly, and without much ado, over.

    I did, though, laugh myself sick at Dad’s recall of the antics around you.

  4. e* says:

    Ah, but you did talk about it… and you did also blaspheme against the keeper of the Thumb—the other Thumb—and for that you may well (again) suffer humiliation and shame at the hands of a team that lost to both South Florida and Mississippi State.

  5. hud says:

    whoa whoa whoa.
    South Florida and Mississippi State didn’t do anything to anybody. How about we leave them out of this?

  6. Big Gray says:

    Wow, Gorjus. Spoken like a true insane Alabama fan. Did you call into a radio show after the game and call for the firing of a coach? That’s kinda what you guys do.

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